new xanga. it looks exactly like this.

www.xanga.com/frenchieex7

hmm so last night was AMAZING.

im so happy right now. for no particular reason. i guess that concert. it was just amazing. we met madina lake TWICE. and the first time we were going to the bathroom in that restaraunt across from the social and im walking and im like oh look thats the band..doo doo doo.. wait a second. THATS THE BAND! then i turn around and jeanie and alyssa are like standing there staring at them in shock. and we went over to them and they said hey to us before we said anything. they offered us nachos lol and one of them complimented my belt and called me girlfriend haha. then i was talking and i spit my gum out and it landed in my hair! that was like the most embarassed ive been in forever. then we were in the very front of the crowd. like we were leaning on the stage. and i got a really good picture of the bass players of madina lake and emanuel because they were like RIGHT THERE. we almost got hit in the face with a bass once it was great, we all jumped back. emanuel was very very good. probably the most scream-o band that i listen to.

i was going to post a really mad post, but i got so happy out of no where. i started singing and i was jumping around like crazy. i think im really getting better. im gonna try at least. i want to get my life to be as happy as i used to be only i want to keep the new me at the same time. i just want to start over again. i feel good. a new xanga is coming very soon. i want to start over theres too many pages on here and i write on it almost everyday now.

im pretty obsessed with the higher now. i dont know i just love them so much since the day i first saw tom on fuse last year. i think im replacing the picture of fall out boy on my desktop with the higher. i still love fall out boy but the higher is just amazing.

my new song: the willing by emanuel. on my subscription list go to ribcagerocket. thats the amazing site that i got my song from.

Currently Listening On Fire By Higher see related

this is the second post in the last few minutes. but im tired of these useless posts that mean nothing. i really have to get this off my chest. i really have to see the words actually written down and coming from me. ive said it so many times but i need to say it again.

i am not them. neither one of them. i never will be them. dont expect me to be. i scare myself sometimes when i get so close to that line. if i cross it ill be just like them. im not. i refuse to cross that line. ill get close but i wont cross. youll have to drag me across kicking and screaming. i will never be them. my whole life ive said it and im saying it again. im not going to make those kinds of choices. im not going to make the same mistakes. you can trust me. every other word out of their mouths are lies. i dont lie. i hope this doesnt end up just another thing i let go. this is just one of those things ive promised myself my whole life. do i want to let that go down the drain? STOP COMPARING ME TO THEM. cant you see that im trying so hard to be different? it sounds so stupid, but every time you say im just like them i feel like ive been stabbed in the heart. the only thing that ever defined me was wanting to be different. i dont want to play this again. i watched this same thing happen twice.

what ever happened to third time is the charm?

ive gotta pee. meggie wont get on. i have to get off at 12. im really bored. this summer sucks so far. its better than school though. i need friends. fun ones. that will call me once in a while. that want to hang out everyday. i love youtube and phone calls with meggie.

you say you want the truth

but its too strong for me to even take

i cant even comprehend

these emotions running through my head

i just want to stop now

and take a second to catch my breath

i dont even know how

but something drove me to the edge

dont be too specific

details dull lies

you want a clean cut

quick and painless